Over the past few months I have briefly given information about my journey back to health. I started down this path in 2012 when I had my first surgery the lap band. Again Surgery in 2015 to remove the failing band and revise to the gastric sleeve. It has been a very long journey, many tears, sore muscles from hours in the gym, with good days and bad days. I can truly say that I would walk the same path again with no hesitation!
I know it might be hard for some people to understand why I went to such great length to get fit. I did it for me! A few weeks ago I reported that my health journey had to take a detour off the road for a bit and take care of a medical issue. That medical issue was my liver counts were very high. After sonograms and more blood work, eliminating a few of the natural supplements I had been taking I’m happy to say my liver counts are normal. Lesson learned ask your doctor about all the supplements you are taking even if they say they are natural. The sonograms showed that I had “mild” NAFLD (Non Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease). The doctor believes that it was worse before I lost the weight and with all the working out and eating right I have almost corrected it. So their advice……..Just keep on keep’in on.
It’s still hard to look in the mirror and see how far I have come when all you see is how far you need to go. I’m within 10 pounds of my goal weight but yet I still feel 300lbs. I’m working on it every day to except what was and what I have earned today. My body has changed, it’s strong and full of energy. Not only is my body changing but my mind is all about what is the right choice for my healthy path. I eat to fuel my body now not for pleasure. I work out to tone my body and I do it willingly. If I go to the gym I go with purpose. I’m changing everyday I’m excepting what I see in the mirror slowly and surely. I try not to beat myself up and keep moving forward. I would never let anyone take my picture, then my daughter said Mom someday you will be gone and we want to have pictures of you. That broke my heart so now I’m more giving about the picture-taking. Slow and steady I’ll get there back to what is normal and excepting.
I’m thankful for some rewards like Tuesday morning. I got to the gym and I couldn’t find my regular workout girls. That is one of the scariest things for me working out in the early morning without these girls. There are a bunch of guys, men and teen boys there and I feel like they are watching me and making fun of me. I know they aren’t but in that moment you feel like all eyes are on you. I just went about my business and pretended the girls were there but on other machines. I know that sounds weird but it helped and I finished my workout. That was a big big accomplishment for me and I’m so thankful for it. I read a blog once about this very thing. Just pushing through without letting things like that getting to you. That blog was @skinnymeg.com she has lots of advice about eating and working out. I like her blog because she has been there, over weight, new at working out and she is honest with it all. This was the way it was when I went to my first class at the gym I would only go if my friend and neighbor Nancy was there. Then one night it happened Nancy had to work late and I found myself all alone without her standing in front of me. The other girls around me were so nice and loving so I stayed and worked out and I didn’t die after all. Funny how we always think the worse but it ends up all good.
Being over weight, unhealthy and defeated was the worst place to be. I was unhappy, tired and about to give up. I some how, but not every day found a little bit of fight left in me. I decided to get up and try really anything to get to the finish line. I still have a few things to take care of before I can be on a maintenance plan for life. The end is in sight and this summer I will finally get to put a very big period at the end of a very long sentence. I’m so looking forward to crossing the finish line.
I believe that if you want something bad enough and you work hard enough it will happen. So far 2 surgeries, 3 plus years, many ups and downs and countless hours at the gym I’m almost there. Who knows what this summer will hold. I know and I’ll share that later in July. I hope that your week is going great it’s Hump Day People. Go have a Blue Happy day!
